rule 1

What they're saying about "21 Rules to Live By"

(full reviews appear below)





"Deceptively Potent"

"Comforting, inspiring, compelling"

"Social artistry"

"Keep on your bookshelf for life"

"Accessible and succinct, yet profound"

"21 Reasons why I recommend this book"

"My daily devotional"

"Beautifully and engagingly written"

"Don't Miss It"

"Recommending it to my patients"

"Twice as good as the 10 Commandments"

"Deceptively Potent"

    "The title infers a pretty big promise and at first blush I wasn't sure it would deliver.

    "It is so simply presented it almost seems simplistic, so clear and direct it seems it's almost too obvious. It felt like I've heard all this before and more than once.

    "But the big kicker is that YES I have and I'm more than slightly embarrassed to say that too many of these most critical of life's lessons have retreated into the recesses of my consciousness - AND I was so happy to be reminded of them again.

    "It is a blessing that this book is written in such an accessible style - because I know I'll be reading it again and again.

    "Perfect for all adults who say we want to live consciously, equally perfect for young adults setting out and especially amazing for teens who don't want to hear any of this from their parents.

    "Don't be fooled, it only seems simple - this book packs a wallop." - Bruce Janklow, Business Executive


"Comforting, Inspiring, Compelling"

    "21 Rules to Live By is a book that like a good friend, speaks to my heart in plain language. The underlying messages are comforting, inspiring and compelling: be yourself, try to experience joy every day, make no decision before its time, give yourself room to grow, allow yourself the prerogative to change your mind, learn from your mistakes and know that they too are a lesson in living.

    "I want to pass this book onto my son and daughter who are in their early thirties, because the advice within it takes a lifetime to accumulate, but this book provides a short-cut to living an examined life." - Claire Law, educational consultant


"Social Artistry"

    "As a psychotherapist and a proponent of the human potential movement, I found Steve's book to be a refreshing resource for clinicians and clients alike.

    " '21 Rules' is filled with wisdom, as well as actual tools, that can create dramatic positive shifts in a person's life when applied.

    "Each 'rule' gives sound, yet easily understood, guidance for eliminating old, useless or dysfunctional patterns of being and replacing them with patterns that promote personal transformation.

    "As I share some of the insightful material from Steve's book with my colleagues and clients I think everyone will appreciate, as I did, the warm, kind and authentic tone of Steve's writing, which gently, yet powerfully, motivates the reader to grow within.

    "With '21 Rules To Live By' Steve, once again, demonstrates his talent as a "Social Artist." - Vicki Hutman, NCC, LPC, LCPC


"Keep on Your Bookshelf for Life"

    "Steve Ferber's 21 Rules to Live By should be one of those books you want to keep upon your bookshelf for life - one you will find yourself going back to and reading passages or the entire book many times throughout your life and one that you may very well decide to pass along to your children and family members.

    "Steve draws upon one of the great human conditions that have no substitute - experience. Taking risks, changing habits and reaching goals are all discussed but perhaps the greatest piece you'll find and receive from reading 21 Rules is how to treat people in general and particularly the most important people in your life - your wife and children and self. Steve Ferber may be one of the most grounded individuals I've had the pleasure of knowing and his work in putting this book together was truly a work of love.

    "I can guarantee you that you'll come to find this book not only helpful in many ways but you will also come to enjoy how easy it is to read and understand and appreciate. My only wish is that Steve continues to pursue this passion and ability to convey his knowledge and experiences in other books in the not too distant future.

    "If you love learning and growing as an individual, then this is one to read and to keep in your personal library." - Mickey Filipponi, business executive


"Accessible and Succinct, yet Profound"

    "In 21 Rules to Live By, author Steve Ferber is a perfect balance of empathic encourager and motivational taskmaster. His 'Rules' are accessible and succinct, yet profound enough to foster enduring personal transformation.

    "As a social worker and clinical therapist, I have deepened my self-knowledge after reading this book and am excited to introduce the '21 Rules' to my clients as a practical tool to enhance their mental and emotional well-being.

    "Thank you, Steve, for sharing your wisdom and enthusiasm with those you have met - and with all of those past, present, and future, who will benefit from reading your work." - Lee Picciuto-Fursdon, social worker, LMSW


"21 Reasons Why I Recommend this Book"

    "I can definitely see myself recommending this book to colleagues and to people I treat in psychotherapy.

    "Why would I recommend 21 Rules to Live By? Coincidentally, my list of reasons totals twenty-one:

    1. "The layout of the book is personal and unpretentious with individual excerpts of answers to questions Mr. Ferber asks 30 of his friends.

    2. "He even lists the questions in the table of contents so we can ask ourselves the same questions.

    3. "He speaks conversationally to the reader as if we, too, are his friends.

    4. "He presents supporting quotations from famous people in all walks of life.

    5. "To further enhance what we learn, Mr. Ferber challenges us with enriching everyday self-help exercises.

    6. "The author presents concepts in clear concise language with no fanfare yet his paragraphs are rich and informative.

    7. "He groups his 21 rules into sections that are relevant such as Making Good Decisions: Listen to Your Heart; Take Risks; You're Free to Change Your Mind At Any Time; Welcome Mistakes. . .

    8. "The underlying concepts run deep into the text and add new meaning to those aforementioned headings.

    9. "He tackles his topics from all angles: personal, experiential and viewpoints from experts.

    10. "Mr. Ferber doesn't profess to be an authority; he is a student of self-actualization and opens up his lifelong learning process to us.

    11. "Mr. Ferber's advice is simple, yet deep, obvious yet far reaching; conversational yet didactic.

    12. "He is a student of successful ways to live an integrated and harmonious life.

    13. "Within all twenty-one topics, Steve asks his friends poignant questions such as, "What's the difference between 'being kind' and 'helping others'?

    14. "His friends answer his questions personally, emotionally and with unabashed self-exposure.

    15. "He convinces us to give up self-centeredness in the interest of listening -- so simple yet so difficult.

    16. "Amongst other good advice, he gives us permission to have fun, listen to our hearts, be kind to ourselves, take risks, change our minds and make mistakes.

    17. "The layout makes for easy re-reading (which most of us will want to do) citing quotations from deep thinkers in the wide margins next to paragraphs to which they apply.

    18. "His language is real, to the point, and never forsakes his reader.

    19. "Mr. Ferber speaks to you directly as if you were sitting in his living room.

    20. "He shares his own growth process in a human, self- reflective way thereby joining us in our own personal journeys.

    21. "His last rule is one of my favorites: Question All Rules.

      - Phyliss Shanken, Psychologist. Shanken is author of "Eye of Irene" and "Conversations with Perfect Strangers: Memoirs of a Psychologist," both available at www.pshanken.com.


"My Daily Devotional"

    "Steve Ferber has provided the guide for making a difference in your life, and more importantly in the lives of all of the people with whom you interact.

    "As a life-long educator, I have always believed the purpose of education should be to change each individual's thoughts, so that their behavior is positively impacted, and that self-actualization creates a synergistic energy in all of their social interactions. Taking the advice offered in the forward, I began reading 21 Rules at Chapter 6, "Pause", something that I certainly do not do often enough. Since then, I have made 21 Rules my daily devotional. Steve writes in a style that I would characterize as 'simplistic profundity'.

    "As a high school Sociology teacher, I have decided to purchase a copy of 21 Rules for each of my students next semester, and plan to explore one chapter each week with my students. I cannot think of a greater gift I can give to my students than to 'Know thyself'." - Dr. Charlie Ostlund, educator, Ed.D.


"Beautifully and Engagingly Written"

    "It's fantastic! It is creatively laid out and beautifully and engagingly written.

    "I highly recommend it to all those interested in understanding themselves and how to improve the way they live their lives. The only thing is, why didn't he do the book about 65 years ago when it would have made a big difference to my life? Oh well, as I learned from the book, it's still not too late." - Ron Taylor, architect


"Don't Miss It!"

    "What a wonderful compendium of rules to live by that are so well written and arranged that one is compelled to read to the end for fear of missing a nugget. Well done, don't miss it." - Patricia F. Hunter, educator


"Recommending it to my Patients"

    "After using this book myself, I started recommending it to my patients. I see it as a practical and approachable tool to help navigate some of life's journeys. My thanks goes out to Mr. Ferber." - Dr. Jerry Back, MD


"Twice as Good"

    "21 Rules to Live By is more than twice as good as the 'Ten Commandments' and a lot easier to carry than stone tablets!" - Dr. Scott Mohler, Psychologist